Do you still have your period?
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
You don't know being judged until its 7:30 in the morning and you're on 2 hours of sleep halfway between drunk and hungover wearing pajama pants at an international airport while saying how proud you are that you found the airport's bar immediately and how disappointed you are that it's closed
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
Randomize
