okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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