Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
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