Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
