he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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