Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
