Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize