Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
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