great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
Guess who's still drunk but on time to court to represent a DUI?
You are my hero
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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