nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
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