Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
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