so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Randomize
