Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
Randomize
