Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
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