Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Randomize
