we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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