Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
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