I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Randomize
