I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Randomize