Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Randomize
