I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
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