My dad just sent me a text telling me to "say hi to all the luscious bitches" at the gay bar. Guess this explains my childhood
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
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