hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
I wish I only lived at night.
Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
Randomize
