Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
one might say we're banned from that church
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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