Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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