All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I just saw a hot homeless man
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
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