Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
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