I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Randomize
