you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Randomize
