I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
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