Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
Randomize
