u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
He blacked out and wouldnt drink anything unless he funneled it, so I made him funnel water
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
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