I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
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