I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Randomize
