Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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