Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
