the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
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