We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
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