It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
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