JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
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