And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
I woke up to the sound of gentle rain, only to realize I was laying under a urine trough in the men's restroom. Fuck you, bourbon. Fuck you.
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
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