dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Randomize
