He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
Randomize
