On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
Randomize
