I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
Randomize
