I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
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