do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
I found an industrial strength sharpie in the drawer so I started writing BONER JAM 2014 on everyone's foreheads so they kicked me out
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
Randomize
