I am puke
So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
So, I woke up to an empty bottle of scotch and a dead car. The last thing I remember are the strippers being mad at me. Awesome night.
Feels good to be wearing underwear again though...
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
pop tarts are not kleenex
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
I need to sanitize my soul.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
The streets are paved with hand jobs
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
