Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
Randomize
