She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
"it" just moved
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
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